All set to suit up!!!

We all belong to family with different life style. I belong to family which do not allow daughter-in-law to wear any clothes which are sleeveless or which revels legs. So I end up wearing Salwar suits (which I never wore unless I was married) and sometimes Saree (I love Sarees and I wear it occasionally).

Now since I am expecting, I was sulking someday back thinking that I might have to borrow my mother- in- law’s clothes to feel more comfortable to fit in since they will be lose fitting to wear at home. I do not fit into many of my clothes. I hate to wear legging these days as temperature has shoot up to 40 degree this summer with no trace of rain. Pregnancy is making me crave so much to wear cute dresses like this.

   

I should surely buy some because I want to live this moment to the fullest. Pregnancy doesn't happen always and I want to keep feelings happy about it J My sister is law is so excited to see my baby bump in dungarees. She is put up in Delhi and has promised me to buy me dungarees. I cant wait to wear them too.

Yesterday we ended up shopping at "Mom and Me". Thanks to RD that we didnt skip on this one. Found some great stuffs which I can  start using now to make life easier during pregnancy.

Leggings with secret fit belly supporter . You also get patialas (named as Nawabis under http://www.momandmeshop.in) Check here http://goo.gl/mmG8w6

Right now reading : http://www.lifewithmylittles.com/2014/03/

More post on Pregnancy coming soon....

Getting back to blog and little bit of being filmy

As I came back home, I rushed to search my laptop and reminded myself where I last saw it. Oh yes, it was in my work station.

The laptop was left untouched, with all the work related screens on and all the messengers on. I decided I need to get back to writing blog and to do that I had to shut down everything so that there is no distraction and the flow of my thoughts are not disturbed.

I had traveled to a nearby city and came back. It was a short travel but a long conversation with me in my head.  The unsaid words to the missed one, I said it all in my thoughts and made some terms with myself, pondered over it again and again. On the way I might have read fifteen blogs which I had saved it to read later on my kindle.

Series of topics came to me which I wanted to write down and I wondered how much I missed writing blog and why had I left it so untouched when there are so many topics I wanted to write about.

As I was travelling back in car, I felt RD head on my shoulder (generally he is not much of a sleeping person in car), I wanted to relish this moment so I kept him continue resting on my shoulder. I kept looking at him, wrapped his hands with mine and wanted to tell him how much I missed him (though he had been with me throughout) and how much he meant to me. Filmy that I am, as a matter of fact there is difference in real and reel life (your phrase I keep stealing.. sorry can’t help it), I felt pain slowing increasing in my shoulder. I wanted to place his heavy head somewhere else to  easy myself and reminded myself that I could not be so filmy to hold him like that for too long, I am a girl not a boy with masculine arms :P.  The pain became intolerable so I finally placed his head to the other side near the car’s door. I smiled to notice that we are not too away from home.

Lots more to write. To be continued..

After all CHANGE is the only thing that is constant

There are things that we deal with every day and when we read an article, blog post or even listen to what others are saying, we relate it to the things we deal with in our life. 

Like Peter (a co blog friend) said, first of all you have to be READY for change, and be willing to go along with whatever comes your way. It made me think of my present situation. I never knew marriage would mean so many changes and that daily routine change to such an extent, that you become a completely different person. These changes may not be seen 100% in behaviour but yes nearly 100% in tasks. I have begun to understand that I was not totally ready to accept the changes that would come with marriage. 

There are things I get to hear which I have never heard. There are some customs which are not followed at my father’s house but now I am left with no option but to follow it. I ask myself, “Why should I follow such weird traditions which don’t make sense to me.” These thoughts of mine hurt me and others as well. I am hurt thinking why strange cultures are thrown at me and I am asked to blindly accept it. On the other hand my family is hurt when I ask them if it is necessary to accept such senseless customs. I get a feeling that they might think what kind of abnormal daughter in law (DIL) I am who asks so many questions and who has issues with everything. 

Before DIL had to follow everything told to them without a question but now things have changed. Ladies are no more scared to question for knowledge and In-laws are no more shocked to see their DIL wanting to know so much. 

Every family has different traditions. Like how parents nurture their child from childhood, teach them values and norms, in the same way it’s their duty to nurture and teach their DIL the exact same things in the same way. Conflicting thoughts cross a girls mind when she compares her mother’s house customs and her husband’s house’s customs. When a person has been doing things in a certain way and has to change their pattern, they face some difficulties in the beginning. 

When I spoke to my husband about this, he supported me completely but he also asked if I can accept certain rules which don’t make sense to me but makes sense to my in-laws just for their happiness. Not following things would not make me sad, but if it can make at them happy then why shouldn't I just blindly follow it for their happiness? My answer to that was - when my heart is not ready to accept some things I cannot do it, no matter for whom. I know it is bizarre to see me so stubborn but I think first I should be “ready” to accept and then only I can accept. 

From day one of my marriage, hundred things are thrown at me to follow, let me choose seventy five of them to follow and twenty five not to. Why should I follow everything when my heart is not ready? May be at some point in time I will understand things and then I will be ready for the changes. 

Yesterday we had “khichdi” for dinner. I being a lover of “khichdi ka Roti” asked my mother in law if the dough can last till next morning so that I could have the same menu for my breakfast too. She replied that, they don’t keep leftover dough for next morning. I asked my Mother in law (MIL) if this was some kind of custom of the family or that our grandmother does not allow. She said that she doesn't know the answer to it because she had been following this since she got married (In those time they were not allow to question anything to anyone). After hearing all this I felt I am blessed to have a MIL who is so frank with me and with whom I can tell and share anything. 

Yes, accepting new things take time and it can only be accepted when I am ready to accept change in my life. It is not necessary that just because I have completed six months of my marriage I should by now get well adjusted to all these norms. It can take a lifetime to adjust, after all life is all about making compromises. 

Restless mind ~~

Its 3:35 AM and I am still not sleepy. Have to be in office my 8:30AM. I don’t know how I will manage. I am having another restless night with bombarding thoughts in my mind. I thought I should return to the cocoon (my blog) and find some peace by having words with myself and my fellow readers.

Finally my sister got engaged. It was a long wait but it happened for good. She isn’t much romantic type of person. These days I realised I too fall in that category. Actually I am romantic but I am not filmy romantic. I am more of logical and practical person who choose to express my feelings with words and gestures. I never know RD would be filmy romantic but believe me he is. It took me long time to realise. You know what I mean when any one say filmy romantic – building castle in Spain types, whim to be in Rome when you are actually in Singapore. But that's like the ideal hero. Don’t we like when Runbeer  (I can imagining him running to catch a can of beer and say my can :P)realises he is in love and does all the crazy things for Katreena in 'Ajab Prem ki Jajab Kahani'? Don’t we glee in every dialogs of 'Dil toh Pagal hai'?

Does being mature take you away from your flight to your fancy land?

I hope NOT!

Within herself

She kept telling to herself that today she would not let the tears pass through her cheeks, that she would be brave and matured enough to hold them in her eyes till the tear drops dried.

She said all that she could to express love.

After all this the boy could reply was that he was sleepy.

Went wasted, went unresponded, unreaction and no awwwwww baby.

Her heart felt a pang and she knew she was done. This heart is not so weak, she kept telling to herself. It’s ok she would talk to him the next day.

As the matter of fact, she is not easy with hiding feelings. Her eyes spoke, her voice spoke and he got to know she was angry, but he didn’t see it broke her heart too.

In life most of the things are unplanned.

Looking back

I thought time has changed,
its time to rain ,
but the clouds fooled me.

I thought he was my best friends,
he came, he stayed
and today there is no more 'he-me'


I thought, like how I learnt
the river flows
and no one can stop

I thought the past is gone,
the memories are buried.
But it still shows off


I thought I came too far
I lost my way in between
but its still so easy to get back

I thought love ends
but it doesnt, it stays,
it is still easy to track

Changing the sides of soul

If changing the sides of soul was so easy.

“Today I am dark and tomorrow I will be bright. For someone I am good and for someone I am really bad. For some time I am new me and ok for some time I can be old me.”

How can people change themselves so much now and then? It’s so difficult to cope with such changes. Some time I tell my brain, it’s time to switch off or else Nidz you will go mad, it’s no use to ponder over such things. But look at this stupid girl her heart is still Pondering.

Drunk with thoughts again...

Words of Encouragement

The road of to healing is long
the process if very slow
how far to get over there
is something you don’t know

but one thing for sure, learn on your own
how to fight and grow and get strong
you see people for what they are
and know who are true and those who are scarce

the ones you thought close are the ones who turn their back
and ones you didn’t think to be there are the ones holding you up
things have gone bad but sometimes the hard way is how you learn
it doesn’t have to be your past that brought this upon you
might just be a way to show you never to take things for granted

past is past no use dwelling on what’s gone
future is what you can make of what is lost
all is in your hand you have to choose your way
coz memories are what you make of them
and you can make new one each day

bad things happen to all
and sometimes you don’t deserve it
but think of it as a way of GOD
and this is to test how you serve him
help yourself and he will be your guide
but if only you stay to curse him and you’ll feel empty inside

nothing I do can change what has happened
only words of encouragement I can give to help you go on
you have gotten this far and it’s amazing in every way
I just pray to god that he helps you get by each day
and help you to regain your strength and see the positive side
and stand back on your feet and be on your way..

Thanks Fee for such a wonderful write up. You truly know what I am going through, you understand what’s suffering and always there by my side to encourage me. Thanks so much, Abhinav your comments were some surprising lines. For people who didn't comment on my previous post- I know u love me, I am your sweet addiction.. simply irresistible.

Life gets busy and so we also get so much involved with daily work that we dont have time to keep up with other things (probably less interesting and below the priority list)

Still you can always find me here.

XOXO

What about Names??

New Year was fun. My childhood friend Shweta came for overnight stay. Didi, Shweta and I had Wine at night and wished each other New year. Even Stole dad’s JD :D

BTW my sis name is also Shweta :D too many Shweta-s I know.. Ya there is this weird thing about following the trend in names and people choose to name their kids accordingly. For eg : After kuch kuch hota hai, Rahul was so famous that every other person were naming their kids -- Rahul. My name was common too at that time, I am glad it was common only in my town though.

During attendance in school there were two Nidhi-s : Nidhi Sunil and Nidhi mangal (actually Agarwal). I had to change my surname cause as per the rule; my surname should match my Dad’s ID card. Mangal is our family-title (Gotra). Since childhood, our surname was written as Mangal. May be in this way blessings of Mangal pandey are showered upon us. But after class 10, I had to change it to Agarwal. Mangal is so unique :-w .  There are thousands of Agarwals/ Agrawals.

As a matter of fact, South Indians use their father name as their middle name and even as their last name. Eg.  Nidhi Sunil, Neha Shekhar (these two were actually two hot gals in my class) ahh no no I am straight, but I like admiring pretty gals. Cool ok.. there is nothing wrong in admiring hot girls.. after all it was girl’s school (Bishop Cotton girl’s school, Bangalore). Ladkiyaan hi Dekhti  :P Saheliya –na  !!!

There is one more thing  which is absurd about South Indians, the way they spell their name. It consists of superfluous alphabets during the end of first name. Eg. It’s NOT Deepti they spell it as Deepthi, Seetha instead of Seeta/sita, Ritha for Rita, shruthi for shruti.

Likewise in Nepal, Nepalese carry different accent in pronouncing ‘Sha’. Instead of Sha Nepalese pronounce is Sa. Eg they pronounce Ashish as Asish, Nidhi as Nidi. They also spell B as v. If they have to type bhayo, which means happens, they type Vhayo. Weird isn’t it?

Every language has their differentiation. This surely make them unique from others' name. I have heard Bengali accent. Earlier, I loved Bengali earlier but after staying for one year in Kolkata and having a roommate who only cribbed to her parents in Bengali, I can’t stand Bengali any more, sorry no offense to my Bengali readers.

Btw I love to hear Hyderabadi language. You don’t know how it sounds?? Run to Peter, he is awesome in it.

Urdu sounds so respectful, Love it. Punjabi oh Balle Balle!!!  My dad is big fan of both Punjabi as language and as well as Punjabis. What do you guys have to say about names and Surnames??

P.s I met Rd yesterday .. M so happy. We met after six months. This 26th Jan We’ll complete our Seven years :D He proposed me On Republic day :D

P.P.S – on 5th Jan i am flying to Bangalore Via Delhi. Wish me Luck.

Light and then Shadow

i have a long day tomorrow. 2 hours of physio and then one hour break to have lunch and reach my tuition centre. 2 or 3 hours of at-a-stretch studies. God now i think we were brave  enough to sit in class for more than 4 hours at a stretch in college and school time (haan though i was big time bunker, mostly bunked first class to sleep more) i managed my attendance :)

That tuition sir is way too fast so i have decided to go through the study material once before his class and then again go through it after the class. Thank god its only twice a  week (that too on weekend :(  )

Saturday seems so long. Didn’t have a good Friday too. Less people to be close with, Where are all my friends gone???

Strangers smile at least but people who know you don’t even tend to smile. A smile is such a nice thing, a hugs much more miraculous. But where are all the miracles gone? Why some people liked not to be hugged ( i mean whom we know like cousins. friends).

A chatter box stays mum. Yuck so not me.

To be away from what makes me feels so dead and lonely i went to crossword (the book store) directly after my Physio. No maid to cook, so no lunch at home. since My cousins who i stay in flat with had plan to shop and eat outside i was left with no other options than eating out in hospital mess. I could eat in a better place too but didn't have energy to walk or travel again to find a restaurant (and eating alone sucks) so long times missed Idly Sambar in hospital mess :)  :)   me likes.

I remember crossword in Blore, they played only instrumental music. I think that's the best option in a place where books are read so that it doesn't distract you and meanwhile doesn't bore the staff or the window shopper.

I went to this crossword ( in calcutta, as in where i am put up right now) picked up the same novel that i have been reading (eleven minutes) and sat to read.. guess the music track they played!!!!

I can be your hero baby, waiting for tonight, backstreet back????  are they back !!! lol..  it sucked, i could hardly concentrate on what i was reading. reading those 15 pages took me more than an hour. eww.. I felt like reporting spam! :D. any ways, read some pages felt nice, didn't wanted to listen to music still tapped my foot during Hero and left the place with a smile and promised myself to come next time not in taxi but my walking. (as i haven't been going for morning walk. it’s too hot during dawn too :|  i know making excuse is easy and sticking to goal is tough

i came home, and started crying.. i don't like being here!! A phase, i know, this too will pass by with better tomorrow. It better be better

IT feels bad, so???

When you come home after a tiring day and no one smiles at you or even ask how was your day, it feels bad.

When you come back from office, one of your family member opens the door knowing its you and not even look at your face to greet you, it feels bad.

 

So what to be done???

Music and Soul

 

At times we set music according to our mood and at times music set our mood.

Its raining outside and I've nothing in my mind except love.

I wish he was here.

Switched on to radio listening to love song and dedicating them to him .

This and That

Trying to watch soap called Lost in Star World but i m not able to concentrate.

the net wire is not connected in my laptop as someone else needs it. Some blog pages are open and I am reading them one by one and drafting comment in my notepad. I think of books i think i have to study, i think of exercise – makes me realise  I missed my physio to say goodbye to Gaurav.

Watched a end of movie and felt i should have logged into the channel before, Christian wedding scene.. awwww so impressive --- reminds me i should have gone to Church on last time with my friend before he left the city. Suddenly I m craving to go to Church.

My one time best friend, Manali who is hardly in touch with me leaves something in FB made me feel I should not wait for her message. May be She is waiting for my message.

I see our wall to wall history – 4 msg from me and one from her …   Phew.. some ppl are so difficult to deal with when it comes to distance.  ( u guys are lucky cuz m most of the time easily reachable)

Had been missing old time spent in PG, Room party with Dim light.. Ooo how i miss yellow bulbs.. here arent any in this flat. Just white tube-light  :|

Manali and i used to go to temple and church quiet sometime. Church does some magic. Its peaceful. its understanding yourself and getting answer to the drooling questions and piling up more questions in mind before leaving….

I have to look for HTML courses and guitar classes – my Present longing.

I m lost i don’t know how to find out about them. Google didn't really help.

Today looks longer cuz my friend is gone and i have no one to go out with :(

I am home watching TV with 1/5 of my concentration.

thinking to play game with 1/5 of my interest.

want to go out with 2/5 enthusiasm.

feeling guilty of wasting time and not able to look for course i want. 3/5 – guilt feeling

Dhuuu the ratio is wrong.. there is just lots in my head and i feel lost. Missing home. :(

 

Saw the FB quizzi( how much do you know Nidhi Mangal i.e. Ur own Nidzzi) nothing above 46%

Feel like listening to “nothing else matters”

P.s. Soap Gossip  >>>  madsi was right. Sugna is pregnant in Balika Vadhu.

Mayank gives roses to Nupur in Mile Jab hum tum.. god i can’t keep my eyes off Mayank in MJHT.

PPS.  Still high on Love story, Taylor Swift

Long time didn't go for shopping, have to buy two jeans.

Feeling that i am growing fat – sitting, eating, sleeping and lying down    :|

two post in a day  :O  :O Better don't ignore my previous post. read and comment on that too :|

Pending stuff -- I have three Novels to read (rolling eyes)

Don’t feel like re – reading the post i know Peter will point out for grammar errors.. but its ok .. u know me..

 

See ya.. Love ya.. Miss ya,, muah…

 

Miss you already :(

My best friend Gaurav is leaving in sometime. He got a new Job and is placed in Guwahati (not sure abt spelling. i suck any ways in spellings)

Shit i am feeling so terrible. I know this was meant to happen. It’s just this three month that i had the longest stay with him in Calcutta. Before we used to meet once in a year but these three months had been best days of my life.

I will miss You so much Gaurav.

I made a farewell card for him which he read and almost cried. Today morning he sent cakes which says “will miss you guys” ( will put the picture if possible).

I cant imagine how will my tomorrow will be. I am so used to meeting and freaking out. every day a anew plan to do something different. Who will i share beer with???  :(

who will i go to Coffee shop with and who will gimme looks when i’ll kurta..

Here is something i have written for him in a card.

(Click the Pic to have better view)

word in the image

 

Words when expressed.. there are so much I want to write about you but you know when we sit down to write down the dictionary too falls short.

My dear friend.

I met for a first time in Calcutta when I was on way for my admission from Nepal to Bangalore. It was his birthday 30th April which slipped out of head many times. Shit I’m bad at dates.

The first time I met him I never knew I would speak to him again. But then it happened. He used to call up in my hostel and I’d his mobile no. and then the call session started. I used to write him letters but which he hardly replied. I just had got his one reply which was of 4 to 5 pages.

Near or far we became very good friends. In transition from Bangalore to Nepal I used to always meet him in Calcutta. So whole year we waited just for day, the day when we friends meet.

Today I'm here in Calcutta and because of him I've so much fun and this city is better place to live in.

“P.S. I'll miss all the places that we've been around. Esp Java, someplace else, thanks for the dinner in ITC, and the south city lane has its own charm. The trip to IIMC and your birthday blast. We showed me it was possible to freak out no matter how bad mood I was in and how difficult in was in my mind. We watched a movie in normal class. We went shopping and you caught my speed. We held hands and walked when I lost confidence. You made it possible to chill in nice weather. I just had to tell you what I want and it was all done, thanks to you my Angel. I feel so blue to imagine you won't be close to me anyone. You are my best friend and how will I move on without you.”

 

 

I Limp so what???

She has the Bipasha Basu type haircut (what you don't know what I’m talking about? Perhaps you should check my previous post)

She has the most amazing smile, she is a bathroom singer but she sings with all her heart out.

She tries to me most fashionable ison.. See she got the freaky hair highlight. Next is purple or blue :-P

but she limps.. She carries her leg and she limps.

She had walk or her life (four hour walk with RD)

Spent most of her weekend dancing in disc. She never stayed home cuz she loved shopping, socialising, partying, rock concert, she even ran to catch auto but today she limps, she doesn't like it but she doesn't wanna stop it so she limps.

She Planned every week end - date or hill station with friends?

Watched movies and enjoyed bike rides wit all guy friends.

Got drunk, picked up by her boy friend.. She is every body's best friend. She went through the most difficult time, an accident followed by ten hours operation, and then many more.. She didn't loose hope, she had inner strength, and she had prayers of so many friends, parents and angels. She walks, doesn't go for movie but still thanks to downloading (piracy rocks), she has crowd phobia but still she shops, she gets over emotional, sentimental and cries till her headaches, missing old times but next day she recovers.. As if it was just a nightmare.

She doesn't loose hope. She limps so what? It’s just a limp . Isn’t it.

I am thankful God chose me among thousand cuz I am strong. There are people who can’t cope up with adversity. I m glad he chose me. What would have happened if it was some other family member. I’m thankful to him cuz he chose me but he healed me too (thanks to all those prayers and blessings)

I saw a man walking in crutch. I thanked God cuz I have passed that stage. That guy walking on crutch perhaps will stay like that forever. He didn’t have both leg. I m lucky I healed.

Glad…

No stretcher

No wheel chair

No Hospital for big operations

No ICU room

No scene of people suffering and crying in pain

No crutch

No lying long in bed

No sleeping straight till back hurts.

No saying No to shopping, movie..

No Plaster

No walker

But JUST A LIMP.

Some takes time to stand on their feet after staying in bed. Thanks everyone for motivating me and making me believe I can do it and I will do it.

Hope in coming diwali I can run after bursting the crackers.

In holi I can chase my friends and they can chase me too.

I can enforce my pending promises, teach Salsa to my friends.

And coming year I too dance with everyone and have that same smile back on my face.

Weird Love

He loves her though he knows she is loved by someone else, her soul mate.

she loves him though she knows someone else loves her and that he is not her soul mate.

 

At times we don’t know what are we are heading to but we go on, life is short and we want to live every moment of it and make it memorable (but without hurting any one).

 

 

Technorati Tags: love,Destiny,Soulmates,Thoughts

Expectation never dies.. (kitne din)

Kash kabhi kehte inte din hoagaye tumse baat nahi kiya,
Inna saare din tumko yaad kiya,
kitne din tumko dekha nahi,
kitne din wo hatho main haat nahi tha.
Kitne din huwe tere chehre ki khilti muskan dekhe huwe,
kitne din tu kareeb nahi thi,
kash kehte tujhe bahut bahut yaad aur pyar kiya.
Kash wo din aaye jab tu kahe tu bas meri
BAS MERI..

For you to fill the empty space

So many things I wanna say.
So many things I want you to say
This time I am not gonna tell you what I want.
This time I'll stop and wait.
This time you understand, you feel,
you know me and you take a step ahead.
Read my mind,
read what my silence says,
read what is missing in my tone
and read why is that joy gone.
I won't tell you what I expect,
I won't react to anything so that you don't over react.
I'll stop and wait for you to understand and care.

Want of his lonely nights

The moon is tired waiting to see her face

The ripples in silent pond still carries the magic

The old tree stands alone, bows down

No one there…



A Stranger passes by

O what a lovely night, he says

The blue sky so high

O i so... i so miss her face.



It's hard to stop and glare

without her the moon looks a scar

the empty wine bottle trashed

vacant fag box and vacant his soul



The night stands alone

precious so much for someone else

to him its the loser’s wait

reason for more wine and heart break

P.S. At times its so difficult to move on with time. Every thing seems so stuck up. We have every thing we desire for but just one that thing which is missing makes our life miserable. life doesn’t seem to come in term. The long lectures from parents and long heart to heart conversation with friends too doesn’t work as healer.

Thanks giving and Relationships

My Bday is over :( :(

Chu se aaya Chu se chala bhi gaya!!

My day was good. Got so many phone calls and sms wishes. Gaurav and Pankaj as usual sent me cakes and bouquets. I would like to thank all the bloggers who wished me through comments on my blog and as well as different blogs. Special thanks to Shitfortat (Peter, Mads, Abhinav, Bhaw), Riversoul (sid), dear Harshita, Sam and Nikhil Menon.

I have been going for my physio every day. The guy who is treating me is a handsome looking Kashmiri guy, Harun. There is another Physiotherapist who is hot too. I think he is Assami but not crush type.. :P

Not bad. I didn’t know Calcutta would be rocking. I had gone to Aqua Java for paan flavoured Hukka with Rahul and Hemant. It was fun. Had gone for coffee with some friends to Costa Coffee at night :)

I haven’t explored Calcutta so much yet I had this thing in my mind that I would never like this place. In fact it’s not bad!

Finally mann ki murad puri hui. I had pasta. Only thing in list now is sizzler.

Mom is planning to leave Calcutta this Sunday. She is dying to go back home(Nepal). I will be staying here with my cousin.

It’s been so long I’m staying with my family. After my accident, my mom had always been with me. Mostly when I had to go to Bangalore for treatment we stayed together. Now I am so used to her that I didn’t realise how will it be when she wont be here. Yesterday when mom asked me to make her flight ticket I thought its good in one way, I will have the same life like before, the discipline free life, more of independence and more of freedom in everything. But the thoughts of me being without her haunted me. She made things so comfortable. I didn’t even had to get up to keep my plates, she used to do it for me so that i don’t have to walk so much.

Mother and daughter relations are different in all the family. Yes the basic ingredience might be same but the comfort zone in the relations is different. I have seen RD talking to his mom and its so different from what my mom and I share. I can even ask my mom to keep quite. He can’t do that. My be the respect is shown more through language and action with him but in my case its there in heart but we are more of friends.

Frankness becomes habit and at times I forget when I cross line with mom and suddenly I see it in her face that she felt bad. I apologise and then things get back to normal. Though we are free with expression I consciously think at times so that I don't hurt her, after all she is elder to me and she is my mother. Ultimately parents will there for us always.

Technorati Tags: Birthday,Mother,calcutta,Nepal