Friday, June 19, 2009

Light and then Shadow

i have a long day tomorrow. 2 hours of physio and then one hour break to have lunch and reach my tuition centre. 2 or 3 hours of at-a-stretch studies. God now i think we were brave  enough to sit in class for more than 4 hours at a stretch in college and school time (haan though i was big time bunker, mostly bunked first class to sleep more) i managed my attendance :)

That tuition sir is way too fast so i have decided to go through the study material once before his class and then again go through it after the class. Thank god its only twice a  week (that too on weekend :(  )

Saturday seems so long. Didn’t have a good Friday too. Less people to be close with, Where are all my friends gone???

Strangers smile at least but people who know you don’t even tend to smile. A smile is such a nice thing, a hugs much more miraculous. But where are all the miracles gone? Why some people liked not to be hugged ( i mean whom we know like cousins. friends).

A chatter box stays mum. Yuck so not me.

To be away from what makes me feels so dead and lonely i went to crossword (the book store) directly after my Physio. No maid to cook, so no lunch at home. since My cousins who i stay in flat with had plan to shop and eat outside i was left with no other options than eating out in hospital mess. I could eat in a better place too but didn't have energy to walk or travel again to find a restaurant (and eating alone sucks) so long times missed Idly Sambar in hospital mess :)  :)   me likes.

I remember crossword in Blore, they played only instrumental music. I think that's the best option in a place where books are read so that it doesn't distract you and meanwhile doesn't bore the staff or the window shopper.

I went to this crossword ( in calcutta, as in where i am put up right now) picked up the same novel that i have been reading (eleven minutes) and sat to read.. guess the music track they played!!!!

I can be your hero baby, waiting for tonight, backstreet back????  are they back !!! lol..  it sucked, i could hardly concentrate on what i was reading. reading those 15 pages took me more than an hour. eww.. I felt like reporting spam! :D. any ways, read some pages felt nice, didn't wanted to listen to music still tapped my foot during Hero and left the place with a smile and promised myself to come next time not in taxi but my walking. (as i haven't been going for morning walk. it’s too hot during dawn too :|  i know making excuse is easy and sticking to goal is tough

i came home, and started crying.. i don't like being here!! A phase, i know, this too will pass by with better tomorrow. It better be better

13 comments:

U can call me your attorney said...

so after writing this post...u must be feelin better!!
reading habit is really nice yaar...i wish i also had fetish for novels, alas!

even hectic days @ the end give u sm sort of pleasure becoz u managed the whole day,quite swiftly and successfully..may u do the same

Sneha Shrivastava said...

Ghar sey dur rehna kabhi kabhi behot hee khrab legta hai I can understand that per hum dur hou ya pass sab humary saath hee tou hain y soch kar tasalli hou jati hai.

lots of love and hug.
Take care sweetheart.:)

peter said...

Some people don't like to get hugged :-/
Even though it's a fact i thought it was sarcastic (yes i did take it personally :P )

arey life can't be smooth all the time..so u better try learning from it.I have already started ..u just join the club :D

Arv said...

Will say a little prayer for you...

Hope the Saturday has begun well for you... pls take care... :)

MJ said...

I have no good words to make u feel better for even i have gone through a phase like this.so i collected some hugs for u ..hope this helps :)

Hug1-Bangalore: Miss U >:D<

H2-Bglr friends:hugzzz >:D<

H3-Momo Stand: >:D<

H4-Bglr Crossword:thanx>:D< (will try to tell kolkatta guys abt da muzik)

H5-Idly Vada Sambar : Me too Likes >:D<

H6-Bishop Cotton: Take Care Dear >:D<

H7:Sigma mall McD :1 coke float takeaway >:D<

last but not least...
one BIG BEAR HUG >:D<
From Me :)

Pallav said...

ok now what all u need is a big smile like this
:)

chalo koi nahi u ll hv good time verrrryyyyy ssooooooooonn..
dnt worry
the best part is u hv ended on posistive note .. n i sure after reading my comment ek smile banti hai yar...
what ?
smile...
n Novel i love....
the problem is i dont get time to read..
but anyways will catch some day

bye
Pallav

Thoorika said...

yeh life kabi same nahi hoti.. ! Kuch na Kuch ulta seedha kaam karthi hai.. par kya kare.. we hav to live it :)

Fantasies of a Lifetime said...

awww :( . . .Don't worry , everyone has those days. . . Eat some chocolate , they can work miracles when u feel like this . . Serious ! . .

Sneha Shrivastava said...

oey keha hai or kasi hai?
take care
Love
Sneha

ankit mittal said...

hmm.. i can teach u html codings,, just ask me wherever u have problems,
i own a very own website,, www.omblues.com
i can also give u free space if u want,,,
n also help u in setting up a top level domain,, as u seem interested,,
let me know
ok
u can mail me at ankit_gangtok@yahoo.com or find me in facebook with the same e-mail,,
regards
ankit mittal

Anonymous said...

D song was enrique iglesias' :P

Mysterious Mia said...

hugs baby n yes this too shall pass dearie....

Unknown said...

What a post. Took me through all phases of emotion and kept me thinking. Sometimes it is really painful to be alone but sometimes you will love it. I know being at a class and pushing yourself can be a pain but the reward is too good to let it hurt you.

About the food at the hospital.. i think it is good to try once in a while. At least it is neat! So gather up and hold yourself... the best is just around the corner...

Stole your thoughts again...
http://www.consumerpsyche.com/2009/06/hitting-right-note.html